Speaking of me getting into a savage rage, I got into my first "verbal unpleasantries" with a Texan the other day.  I had to fire my landscaper because he just never showed up - can't cut the grass when it's wet, one of his machines are in the shop, can't find the right weed killer, whatever.  So Mrs. Fly sees another landscaping guy in the neighborhood and calls him over to the house to take a look at the yard and give me an estimate.  I meet him in the back yard (which looks like crap because it hadn't been mowed in over 2 weeks).  So as we're talking about the extent of the job and agree on the price, he's smoking a cigarette and then when he's done, he proceeds to throw it on my yard and step on it.  Thanks for the consideration - we wouldn't want to start any fires.

BUT SERIOUSLY WTF?!?  I was standing there having a normal conversation with the guy, and he decides to litter on my yard?!?  So I immediately say to the guy, "WTF are you doing?!?"  I wasn't yelling at him or anything, but I was just so stunned that some dude I was interviewing to MAINTAIN MY LAWN just f*cking LITTERED ON MY LAWN!

He then says some moronic thing about how it's biodegradeable.  So at this point, I just can't believe the unfathomable stupidity that is now flowing from his mouth.  And I say, "so I have to stare at that shit for years until it degrades?"  I wanted to say "are you a f*cking moron?!?"  but I was so disgusted, I just told him to leave.  I generally try not to waste my time with retards - it keeps the blood pressure down.

I just can't think of anything this mind blowingly stupid during an "interview." Like maybe if in the middle of an interview, I decided I needed to go to the bathroom and I decide to just pee in a potted plant in the corner of the office.  I have no idea how people that dumb could have made it thru life.

So I decided that people who litter (and in particular cigarette butts - because if you want to kill yourself then fine, but f*cking make it as zero-imprint as possible!!!) are #2 on my list of TOP 3 EVERYDAY PEOPLE WHO NEED TO BE SAVAGELY BEATEN.  #3 and #1 in later posts.

Breathe in...  Breathe out...

Okay.  I'm all right now.  :-)