Happy Memorial Day!  Well, I guess there's nothing "happy" about it...  To commemorate this and the UIGEA legislation (anti-online gambling law that was tacked on to a Port bill) that's supposed to go into effect tomorrow, I will hold a moment of silence and skip a blog post.  Technically I won't be skipping a day on my blog - I had been posting every day at 1:00 AM but now, I'm going to be posting at 11:00 PM.  For those of you bad with numbers, May 31th 1:00AM to June 1st 11:00PM is almost two days between posts.  This effectively is taking a day off, but I'm also doing this so that when I refer to the previous day, it'll actually be the previous day from the date of my blog post, and not two days before.  I had been contemplating this change for a while and today seemed to be the perfect day.

I don't expect much to change once UIGEA goes into effect.  Most banks had been curtailing transfer of funds to and from online gambling sites for over six months.  There is a small concern that casual players may have a harder time getting money online, but I'm not sure if things will be any different than they are already.  Even if they do, we can always rely on the Europeans.  It's also more satisfying taking money from people overseas than my fellow Americans.  Well...  not really.

June 1 is also the day I'm going to stop using the excuse, "I'm still learning how to play 6max."  On the one hand, I'll always be learning how to play better - even if I were to play for a few decades.  But it's been over three months since I started playing 6max.  I pretty much know the game and nuances as well as I know full ring at this point.  Now it's just time to start making some money!  My goal is to have another 100+ buy-in month before the end of the summer.  It might be tough because we're planning a few road trips, but I'm up to the challenge.  As I've said before, get ready for some pwnage!!!  Hopefully I'll be the pwner and not the pwnee.

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

We got invited over to another BBQ today.  They are opening up their pool and are having a cookout to go with it.  Trip report later.  I'm just seriously getting fat from all these cookouts.  Maybe the Formerly Obese Man will go back to being Obese Man - or worse, Even More Obese Man.  I don't want to get on the scale for my next weigh-in!  Surely, I can't take another mulligan on the weigh-in...  In before my brother says "don't call me Shirley."

Since I mentioned my panda avatar a week or two ago, and to break things up a little, I bring you my three favorite and three least favorite avatars on FT:

FAVORITE

3.  Panda - well for starters, he does sort of resemble me.  Call me vain, but I just looking at him.  And I like the fact that he looks so dopey - he couldn't possibly do anything sneaky or out of the ordinary.

2. ATM machine - sure, it's a little obvious that you're trying to say you suck at poker, and that all you do is spew money.  But it's more subtle than going with the fish avatar, and some of the online poker noobs may actually get a laugh out of it.

1.  Hottie in devil outfit - hands down the best looking avatar on FT.  Some of the other female avatars look like trannies, lesbians, etc.  But hottie in a bikini top and devil horns is a classic.  I wish FT sold that outfit in the store so I can get one for Mrs. Fly.  Happy Anniversary to me!

LEAST FAVORITE

3.  Serial killing clown - ummm...  can we keep the game friendly?

2.  Man-eating plant - What kind of person wakes up and says, "I'm going to be a plant today and take all your monies."  I keep thinking of Little Shop of Horrors, even tho I've never seen the play or movie.  A psycho who likes show tunes...  great.

1.  Not PC Asian - can this avatar be any more offensive to Asians?  Slanty eyes, bowl haircut, can't tell if it's a man or a woman, but (s)he's probably good at math.  Where are the glasses?   Did I mention some of the avatars looked like trannies?   From the looks of his/her outfit, I'm guessing (s)he's supposed to working in a massage parlor? Please...  Don't love me long time.  Ugh.  Facepalm.

Love my inlaws - seriously.  TBH, I think I get along better with them than Mrs. Fly does.  I LOLed when I saw this picture because my brother-in-law ("A") and his wife ("S") have a daughter and picked a name starting with an "S."  So when I heard, I said to Mrs. Fly, "What are they doing?!?  Their family initials are A-S-S!  How can you pick names such that you become known as The ASS Family?!?"  Fortunately, they had a son a few years later to clutter up the family initials a bit.  And his name doesn't start with a "Y" - thanks to my brilliant guidance.

A & S are two of the funniest people you will meet - especially after you get a few drinks in them.  Another reason this picture reminds me of them is that one year, they dressed up for Halloween as "shits."  I think he went as "tough shit" and she went as "holy shit."  Pretty much the same train of thought as the photo.

Mrs. Fly's parents couldn't make the trip because the father-in-law cut his finger on a saw blade two weeks ago and he had to go to the hospital.  He's okay, but they had to give him painkillers and taking a 5 hours drive is probably not the best thing for him.  My family owned a general contracting / custom cabinetry company for a long time, so I remember my father running his finger in the saw blade more than once.  I'm sure both of them were pretty careful but they do a  lot of work with wood.  I suppose it's like if you have unprotected sex enough times, you're bound to get VD eventually.  Not sure which is worse, and don't really care to find out.

Anyway, we have a whole bunch of things to do before they come over.  My main job is to clean up my office, but this is usually pretty quick.  Not because I'm a neat guy.  Basically, "cleaning my office" involves me taking all the crap I like to keep on top of my 12 foot long desk, shoving it into a box and shoving the box in the storage closet until they leave.  Yes- I am *that* lazy.

We decided to make both bbq spare ribs and baby back ribs tomorrow, so this is pretty exciting.  Then we're going to my brother's weekend house on Sunday for some poolside gorging.  Trip report to follow, unless 2-day-long drunken merriment prevails, in which case it may be later.  Don't worry - I have some backup posts in case you need your daily blog fix.

Poker the last few days have been really puzzling.  I had been showing a lot of improvement in pots that don't go to showdown, but the past few days, it's just been a complete nosedive and worse than ever.  Granted it's a pretty small sample, and I haven't lost much money, but when you're focusing on improving some part of your game and the results go so noticeably the wrong way, you're left scratching your head.  I think part of it is a bad run of cards, but I'll have to keep an eye on things (as usual) and reevaluate.

On the pest control front, Stumpy seems to be working!  Just in time for the in-law visit.  Now I have to go out and clean up the goose poo - hopefully for the last time.  Not sure what I hate more - cleaning up goose poo or changing D's diaper after he has an explosive diarrhea.  I'm going to have to think about that one. My mother used to tell me that when you dream about crap (or step in crap or do anything related to crap), it's a sign you have money coming your way, so I'm just looking forward to that pending boomswitch.  Or maybe I should look into this Powerball that's $220 mil.

WHAT'S FOR APPETIZERS?

Over the years, Mrs Fly's been perfecting her Vietnamese summer rolls.  I've never really been a fan of it at restaurants because the carb to meat ratio is just completely off.  At most places, it just tastes like you're eating rice noodles and lettuce wrapped in rice paper.  As Whale used to say, that's like a chessboard full of pawn.  Sorry - I'm not a prisoner of war stuck in some Southeast Asian concentration camp.  Shoot!  If I was in the Deer Hunter, I would gladly LOOK for the bullet if they kept feeding me that crap.

But Mrs. Fly did a few things to make it taste better - she adds fried shrimp (instead of boiled shrimp), avocado, and...  BACON!!! God Damn!  <3 Mrs. Fly.  Anyway, she's been taking these over to various get-togethers the past few months and several people have said this was the best they've ever had.  I would have to agree.  I may have to "thank" her later.  I love the way she replies in her cute voice, "No thank you.  You can just thank me now."  LOL.

Speaking of the Deer Hunter, I heard this unbelievable fact while listening to the Yankee game yesterday: During John Cazale's (best known as "Fredo" in the the Godfather movies) six-year film career he appeared in five films, each of which was nominated for the Academy Award for Best Picture: The Godfather, The Godfather Part II, The Conversation, Dog Day Afternoon and The Deer Hunter.  I just never heard of such a thing.  Granted, he had a tragically shortened career, but 5 for 5 is pretty unbelievable.  On a side note, I remember chatting with a guy from business school who said he was an avid film buff, but had never seen the Godfather.  Seriously, WTF?!?  If you haven't seen it, go see it now!

Mrs. Fly wasn't feeling well yesterday so I took care of the the kids in the evening.  I picked G up from his playdate and D up from school.  We went to one of the many parks in our town and spent a little time in the playground closest to us.

Then we went to Burger King for dinner.  It's been a while since I've been there - usually we go to McDonald's. I tried their new ribs.  I thought I read someone saying that it was almost as good as some restaurant ribs.  I will just say "no" to that and move on.  We went to BK instead because they were supposed to have Ironman toys, but they were sold out and offered this unbelievably lame looking plastic dog instead.  C'mon BK, my son may be 6, but he's not a retard!  Lame plastic dog <<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Ironman toy.  So I just got him nuggets, fries and drink off the dollar menu, because...  you guessed it!  I'm a cheap ass!  I'm not paying the extra $1.50 for a Kid's meal when the toy is a plastic nondescript dog.  Did I mention it was lame?

Speaking of lame animals, Stumpy arrived yesterday.  Basically it's a rubber/plastic shell that's hollow - think molded basketball with a big hole cut out in the bottom.  So there's a stake that attaches to the top of Stumpy's back and this allows him to swivel around in the wind to make it look like he's moving.  He also comes with a fake fur tail.  I have no idea why Stumpy's maker decided to make 95% of stumpy in a cheap plastic/rubber compound and add the "luxurious" fur tail.  All I know is, once Whale and Sainter figure it out, they are going to be victory wiping their asses with that furry tail after they crap all over him.  Poor Stumpy.

JOKE

Stumpy's fate reminds me of an Eddie Murphy joke:

a bear and a rabbit, takin a shit in the woods
the bear turns to the rabbit and says:
"excuse me do u have problems with shit stickin to your fur?"
the rabbit replies:
"no"

so the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit

Poor Stumpy.

[This is a post I made recently in the Full Tilt customer service thread on 2+2, and what I spent my time on today rather than writing the usual blog post.  If you agree with some or all of the sentiment, can you go "+1" my post in the Doug Thread?  Thanks.]

Dear Doug,

It has come to my attention that at least two regulars have received merchandise from the store that was refurbished.  How does that happen?!?  That is not how you treat your top customers.  I think you need to take a step back and take a look at your store and points system overall:

* The merchandise in your store is very meh.  Granted, it's getting better, but considering many items seem to be drop shipped via a third party (and you don't warehouse the items), you can probably negotiate a wider selection of merchandise.

* All merchandise take a rakeback hit.  Charging people money for a token of your appreciation is just bad form.  Readjust the points if you have to - you seem to readjust periodically anyway.

* It takes between 3-6 weeks for merchandise to arrive.  I assumed part of it is because you wanted players to "clear" the points they already accumulated and spent, but considering my volume, many items I order still take a long time.  So now I am of the opinion that mostly it's because the Store is slow.

* And now...  merchandise may or may not be new.  When two high volume regulars say they got bad merchandise within a few days, it makes me wonder if this is a change in policy.  I recently ordered something small for a charity event and now I'm wondering if that item was refurbished and I'm going to look like a douchebag for donating a refurbished item to charity.  I really hope this was your supplier trying to rip you off (as bad as that sounds), rather than a conscious decision by management to save a few bucks.

What are you doing?!?  You are a multi-BILLION dollar company.  You are not Joe's House of Discount Poker located in some mom's basement.  You are currently the NUMBER TWO online poker site in the WORLD. 

Am I wrong in assuming that at some point, you would like to be the #1 poker site in the world?  How do you expect that to happen?  Not sure if you are aware, but at PokerStars (the #1 poker site), you can exchange your points for CASH or ANYTHING CASH CAN BUY (exclusions for hookers, blow, etc. ).  So let's see...  I can play at FT and get a small selection of refurbished merchandise which will cost me money and will take over a month to arrive, OR I can get TWICE AS MUCH CASH or ANYTHING CASH CAN BUY.  Wow.  That's a tough decision for both current and new high volume players. 

The only logical explanations I can think of are: (i) incompetence - no explanation needed, (ii) nepotism - like if Lederer had a high school dropout nephew was in charge of the Store and he had a coke problem and he needed to skim off the top, or (iii) this is all intentional, and is part of a bizarre conspiracy to get us to use the points on tournament entries rather than merchandise.

The Store is suppose to be a player REWARDS program - a way for you to tell your high volume patrons, "Thank you for your continued support."  It's not that different from a live casino where they have a dedicated marketing department that makes sure its customers are happy and keep coming back.  But the Bellagio would never say, "yes - I can get you in for dinner, but not at some of the better restaurants.  Oh - and you have to eat the other patrons' leftovers," or "I can get you seats to see 'O' - how does next September sound?" or "we would love to arrange for limousine transportation - but you have to pay for the gas."  For a rewards program, you're not making players feel like they are being rewarded.

Finally, this post is not to hate on FT.  On the contrary, I really enjoy playing on your site and would like to see you become a world-class organization.  After watching you for two years, I don't think you're headed in the right direction.

- Doublefly

P.S.  Don't doomswitch me!
P.P.S. Yes - I know this was tl;dr.

Well, I cured the grill and used it for the first time.  I suppose I should just say that cooking over charcoal kicks the shit out of cooking on a propane gas grill.  HOWEVER...

* The grill we got is of very meh quality.  During the curing process, the paint started peeling on the bottom of the grill.  I think all the peeling has stopped (because there's no more paint), and you can't really notice it unless you like crawling around and looking up.  Probably not a good way to introduce yourself to women - just sayin'.  It's annoying tho.  Also, not sure if it's just me, but when parts of the grill are called a "charcoal pan" and "charcoal grate," I don't think it should warp when it comes in contact with say...  charcoal.  I'm probably just a wee bit old school, tho.  The charcoal was hot, so *maaaybe* I'm partly to blame.  Because who would think of ever putting hot charcoal in a grill?!?  Silly me.

* cleaning the remant charcoal is somewhat messy.  Cleaning the grates is an absolute nightmare, so I think I may have to get some easier-to-clean cooking surfaces or use foil.

I figure we'll use this only when we have bigger get-togethers, so I'm still glad we got the grill.

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

Anyway, we smoked our first batch of dead animal - ribs and chicken wings.  Mrs. Fly's dry rub and BBQ sauce were good, but unfortunately, 3.5 hours was not enough time to get the ribs tender.  I think it may have been okay if we had used baby back ribs, but we went with spare ribs because that's what the recipe source recommended.  The jist was that real BBQ lovers prefer spare ribs.  Not sure that this is true, but I think I either need to do 8+ hours of spare ribs or like half that time for baby backs.  Live and learn.

Turns out my neighbor is in the restaurant business, and he goes to Kansas City a few times a year for BBQ.  Um...  Doh!  The plan is to get awesome by the end of the summer and invite him back.  But I think he had a good time - his kids went fishing in our plake (maybe later post) and almost caught a 5 pound bass.  Obviously the 6-8lb test line on the fishing poles need an upgrade.  We never go fishing in the plake - partly because I prefer eating saltwater fish and partly because I didn't realize there was bass in there.  But it was pretty embarrassing because I'm waiting until Stumpy arrives before cleaning the last of the geese poo, and there was still some geese poo by the water.  I'm gonna get those birds if it kills me!!!

I remember a few people mentioning in the forums a few months ago whether they would want their kids playing poker.  I was reminded again the other day because someone posted this mod in one of the forums.  Basically a mod is a graphics file that lets you replace the default poker site graphics with your own custom graphics.  In case you've lived in a cave for the past 30 years (or are Amish), the above has characters from Super Mario Bros.

G will ask me from time to time to teach him how to play.  So far I've said no - but not because I've had any moral opposition to it.  I think poker is a fun, educational and strategic game.  I just don't think he's ready for it.  I've always been a proponent of playing games with your kids - games are a great way to develop good social skills (like sportsmanship), learning to think strategically, as well as strengthening concepts learned in school, like reading and math.  Ever since G was young, I've been playing games with him - like Uno, Guess Who, Monopoly, etc.  We probably have over three dozen games in his toy closet, and this doesn't include the dozens of video games we have.  So at some point I will teach him how to play poker.  I just don't want to get a phone call from the local principal that G won everyone's milk money.

If you consider poker as a stand-alone game - it's got to be one of the top strategy games out there.  So simple, yet so complex.  Most of the objection to poker comes from the fact that large sums of money are wagered in poker, which some people deem to be a negative.  People don't seem to be anywhere near as vocal with people wagering on bridge, mah jong, chess, go, golf or other games of skill.  IMO, putting a little friendly wager on something just make things more interesting.  But as with many things in life, done in moderation is fine, but done in excess is not so fine - whether you're talking about gambling, alcohol, cleaning, eating, sex ... you get the idea.

If anything, teaching someone the correct fundamentals of poker, which involves good risk management, good bankroll management and emotional discipline are all unbelievably solid POSITIVES.  There is no such thing as a good poker player who does not posses all of those qualities.  I have no idea how the retard who lost his house in a poker game became the poster child for poker.  Seriously - how does that happen?!?  It's like saying basketball should be banned because of Gilbert Arenas or Len Bias.  Just because you have a few irresponsible participants in a beautiful game should not be an indictment on the game.  That's why it just seems mind-numbingly dumb that there's even some talk of banning online poker.  I think it's actually illegal in some states.  Face palm.

Week 3 was pretty good.  I made 3+K each of the 3 full sessions I played.  I'm finally close to being flat ev this month.  I also stopped playing 1/2 Rush this week.  While I enjoyed just getting the feel of low-risk grinding, it was taking up almost half of my hands, and I wasn't making much money doing that.  But I was glad I did it, as it allowed me to work on a few things.  Most importantly, I feel pretty confident again in my game.

Playing only 15K hands in a week is pretty sad, but I feel pretty rested and am looking forward to getting back on a good play schedule.  I tried putting in a long session today, but was only able to play 6 hours.  I guess to a lot of people, playing 6 hours of non-stop poker is a lot.  But I already have nine 8+ hour sessions this month.  I took a break to have dinner and read G a bedtime book, and now I'm a little too groggy to play.  Probably a combination of being down 1.5K at one point, rallying to be up 3.1K, eating pizza, having a beer to wash it down and sipping the glass of muscat that we had left over.

I got up a little late today and wasn't able to assemble the smoker / grill, so I'll have to do it tomorrow.  Mrs. Fly and I had a good time after dinner going over recipes for Sunday.  We decided on a 2.5 hour recipe for Memphis style ribs and a 2 hour recipe for chicken.  Since this is our first time using a smoker, going for an 8+ hour recipe is probably not the best idea.  As a test run of the grill, tomorrow we're going to grill some flank steak and make some grilled chicken wings (sort of like the wings at Bertucci's, which are pretty good). We went to Buffalo Wild Wings a few days ago, so I'm a little OD'ed on wings, but Mrs. Fly seems to have a craving.  This may be hard to believe, but as much as I love fatty dead animal, I like variety.

[later...]

I assembled the grill - the job looked much worse than it actually was.  Now I'm in the middle of curing the grill for use.  Apparently you have to leave a fire in there for 3 hours before you can use it.  Ahhh...  the things suburban noobs learn.  The Cowboy brand lump charcoal look like remnants from a flooring shop.  Sort of makes it a little less appetizing.  I guess the briquettes are made from the same material (or worse), but at least with briquettes, you're not staring at pieces of wood with tongues and grooves in them.  I hope they took the polyurethane finish off first.  I'm going to Home Depot later and get some regular charcoal until I find a better lump charcoal brand.  The saga continues...

I got an email saying Stumpy is being sent over.  Whale and Sainter's days are numbered...

But exciting news!  We have a new addition to the family!  It's a Brinkman charcoal grill & smoker.  We have a Weber propane grill which continues to serve us well.  But now that we're closing in on living in the 'burbs for four years, we thought it was about time to add to the family.  There wasn't much of a selection at Home Depot, but I've seen champion BBQers use homemade rigs made of steel drums, so I don't think a smoker needs to be fancy.  This one was only $200.  Maybe if we ever put in a outdoor kitchen, I'll get something nicer.  To be honest, I'm not sure how I'll feel about checking the heat over the 10+ hours it may take to make certain forms of BBQ.  So this is basically the starter smoker - just to see how I like it.

I had been talking about getting a smoker for the past two years, but never got around to doing it.  Mrs. Fly mentioned that she wanted to try and make ribs this weekend when we have some neighbors over and wanted to get a charcoal grill.  We also have the in-laws coming the week after that, and a large outdoor linner party the week after that, and so on.  Then I said if we're going to get more patio paraphernalia, we might as well go "whole hog" and get a smoker.  Also, I miss the wood taste in my steaks, so having the little grill on the side is nice.  We also got a huge bag of lump charcoal and hickory chunks and chips, so we're pretty excited.  I suggested to Mrs. Fly that we should grill some steaks soon - just so we can give it a "test run."  It would totally be pointless to grill turkey breast or vegetables over charcoal.  C'mon!  That would just be ridiculous.

Anyway, we're pretty excited about the prospect of smoking and charcoal grilling all summer.  As you know, I looooove dead animal.  In addition to being able to make new foods like baby back ribs and brisket (which we had never tried making before), some of the foods we used to make would taste so much better with the smoker - like Mrs. Fly's pulled pork.  My mouth is watering already.

I'm itching to go and assemble it now, except Mrs. Fly invited a few of her friends over and I think I'm supposed to be staying in my quarters.  Sanctuary!

Because why would I want to go outside on a perfect day and have appetizers and wine with three attractive women?  I'd much rather stay inside and grind like a sweatshop worker.  Oh all right!  I actually did prefer to stay in my office.  Hanging out with Mrs. Fly's friends is not really my thing.

After playing like a maniac for a few weeks, I've played only two of the last 6 days.  I guess that's one of the nice things about online poker - you play when you want to and can take time off when you want to.  Not sure if it's just me, but I find it easier to either play over 50 hours a week or under 20 hours a week.  Once I get going, I really like cranking out the hours, and my body gets used to that schedule.  It's a little more tiring for me to play 35 hours a week because I usually have to switch sleep schedules.  I'm thinking it's probably just me.

I'm going to eat and take a nap and try to get back to a grinding schedule so that I can make a stretch run going into the end of the month.  My inlaws (parents and sibling's family) are coming up from Virginia at the end of the month for Memorial Day weekend so the next week or so is pretty much the only time I'll have to play.  After my nap, Mrs. Fly and I are going out for lunch and to Home Depot for a surprise (later post).

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

Mrs. Fly's been trying to cook a little healthier and she made this chicken BREAST (!!!) and noodles with her coconut curry sauce.  They must've run out of chicken feet, beak, and feathers at the supermarket.  If this marriage is going to last another ten years, we need to have a talk.  Aw, just kidding.  <3 Mrs. Fly.

For those of you unfamiliar with internet abbreviations, "<3" is "love" - it's supposed to be a sideways heart.  When I first started spending time on the poker forums, I would see it all over the place and I had no idea what it meant.  Contextually, it seemed like it meant that you either liked someone or hated someone, so I wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a heart or a penis - albeit a very small penis, which I thought was part of the insult.  Hmm...  mounting evidence that I'm just a dirty old man.  If only I had thought to use this thing called "google" - not sure if you guys have heard of that.

The curry was good.  And having it with pasta was a nice change of pace - for some reason, I always associate have rice with curries.  I just had a hard time getting over the fact that chicken breast somehow managed to get into the house.  I need to call ADT and "beef" up the security system - sometimes an incident like this occurs and you just don't feel safe in your house any more.

So I wake up today and I see my good friends Whale and Sainter on my patio.  For those of you who don't play midstakes poker, Whale and Sainter are my #1 fans - Whale hates me more than anyone else I know and Sainter owns me more than anyone else online.  I'll let them decide who is the male and who is the female.  They had never ventured this far from the water before.

So I step outside, and what do I see?  Oh look!  They left me a present!  Words could not describe my disgust when I saw this unbelievably huge deuce in front of the kitchen sliding door.  For the city clickers out there, the typical goose poo is like 1/2" in diameter.  Granted, we have a pretty lush yard, and stuff is falling from the trees all the time.  But WTF are they eating to cause this crap to be so enormous?  I'm afraid to go look at my lawn now.  I could have sworn I heard one of the geese say "Oh Truuuee" as he was leaving my patio.

This prompted me to go online ASAP and order a coyote decoy and some professional repellent spray.  I had asked Mrs. Fly to do this, but she kept forgetting.  Maybe she secretly enjoys laughing her ass off when I have to go and clean all the craps up, and didn't want to kill her entertainment.  Anyway, the one I ordered is to the left.  Not sure how scared I would be of a quadriplegic coyote - hopefully these geese won't realize that a coyote with no legs won't be able to chase them anywhere - they are just dumb birds after all.  But I guess they had to remove the legs so it won't blow over in the wind (like the owl).  I think I'll name him Stumpy.  Just counting the days until I see Whale and Sainter call my bluff and crap all over Stumpy.  Hopefully, they'll remember I'm a nit and nits don't bluff.  All-in!

I really hope this works because if it doesn't, then it's time for me to go Kraven the Hunter on those geese (a Spiderman villain for those of you not into comics).  All the skimpily clad PETA model protesters won't be able to keep me from going ape on these geese.  Well, now that I think about it, maybe a few of them could "talk" me out of it.  Maybe.

It is the 10 year anniversary of our civil marriage.  We didn't have our church wedding and reception until October tho.  Why such a long delay?  We had already set the date for our reception almost a year before.  A few months later, when we were thinking about what to do on our honeymoon, it occurred to me that I would be graduating from business school and that I would have almost 3 months off before I had to start work.  That's the kind of time off most people never get to take off once you start working (well, unless you're a professional poker player).  So we decided to take a 2.5 month honeymoon.  United Airlines had a "round the world" ticket with the other members in its alliance at the time.  Not sure if they still have it, but at the time, for like $3.5K, you got to fly 25K miles in their network.  So we went all over the place - Tahiti, Cook Islands, New Zealand (3 cities), Australia (4 cities), Bali, Beijing, Copenhagen, and Paris.  Maybe I'll write more in later posts.  We spent most of our time around Australia + New Zealand because we could go most other places in the world in about 7-12 hours, but it basically takes a full day to get to that part of the world.  Anyway, I figured the long honeymoon would go over better with the in-laws if we actually got married beforehand.  So, happy anniversary Mrs. Fly!

I can't believe it's been 10 years already.  We've had our share of drama and tragedy, richer and poorer, but overall it's been a great journey.  We still feel like a young couple that's still dating.  After 10 years, we enjoy spending time together as much as we ever had.  Altho to be fair, after a hectic day with G & D, we're just happy to get any kind of alone time.  Mmm...  alone time.

We're not doing much to celebrate - Mrs. Fly prefers to celebrate the anniversary in October.  We're not religious, but that is the day she walked down the aisle.  Waiting in line at City Hall is not much to remember.  There's a school function that night, so we can't really go out.  We'll probably go to a local Italian restaurant for dinner in the next few days tho.  I was originally going to take her overnight somewhere - maybe to NYC or Foxwoods, but that'll have to wait until the fall.

I made it as high as #3 on my rake race a few days ago.  I had mentioned that I try to make it into the top 15 every month as my volume motivation.  But I think I should have some rule where I have to take some time off if I'm ever in the top 3 (maybe even top 5), because that means I'm playing waaaay too much.

I haven't played poker in over 3 days.  Feels like an eternity.  Last night, I had a dream where I played a 5 handed pot with 45s.  The flop was 556, and I bet getting two callers.  Turn was a 2 and I checked.  The river was a 6 and I made a half pot bet which was called by the two remaining opponents.  I scooped the pot vs 57o and 58o.  Now I'm not sure what was the most bizarre part of that was - that I actually dreamt about poker or the fact that I didn't bet the turn, or that I didn't realize there were five 5s in the deck or that it was a three-way split pot until after I woke up.   [EDIT: Mrs. Fly looks at the picture of Homer Simpson and says, "I thought you weren't going to post any actual pictures of yourself for a while."]

Not sure what to make of the dream.  I guess at the highest level, it means I miss playing poker.  But I hope at a deeper level, it doesn't mean I'm playing poorly and that the only way I can get money shipped to me is via luckboxing and dealer error.  I need to go back to dreaming about Jessica Alba - so much simpler and so much more pleasant.  [Awaiting beating by Mrs. Fly.  I wonder if she learned any new moves at that benefit against domestic violence the other night.]

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

Dinner at our friend's place was great.  They have a brownstone with a small yard, so we went outside.  We had free-flowing wine, burgers, chicken and sides.  The most unusual flavor combo were these olives marinated in anchovies.  Sounds gross, but was actually pretty good.  It's definitely not the type of thing we would have bot ourselves if we saw it at the store, but now that we know, we may get some (we usually don't buy olives).  That's what's great about having so many friends who also enjoy good food - whether it's the anchovy olives or goat cheese and fig preserves, you get exposed to new flavors all the time.  Life is short - enjoy everything it has to offer.

Week 2 was much better than week 1. I'm definitely starting to get the feel like I *should* make money every time I play.  I had one really bad session and one bizarre session in there, but overall, I feel like I'm playing better.  And the best part is I have a few key areas where I think my game is particularly weak, so there is a lot more upside.

It's interesting to me that I've been playing professionally for 21 months now, and I'm still learning the game.  It really is true what they say - poker takes five minutes to learn but a lifetime to master.  Or was that an Othello commercial I'm thinking of?  Not sure why this picture makes me laugh - partly because I use the panda avatar on FT, partly because I feel like I'm just bumbling around playing poker, or maybe just that the facial / physical resemblance to me is astonishing.  And I just realized his name sounds like mine.  "He was so deadly, in fact, that his enemies would go blind from over-exposure to pure awesomeness!"  Maybe I should have that be my new poker goal.  :-)  My second choice would be "I'm not a big fat panda. I'm THE big fat panda."

WHAT'S FOR DINNER

Dinner at Maria & Luigi's house was great as usual.  Usually I just sip a lot of wine during parties.  But Luigi made a great cocktail with vodka, sparkling orange beverage, and grapefruit and I had to have a second tall glass.  Dinner was ribs, chicken. mac & cheese, baked beans, corn, and I'm forgetting something - probably a vegetable.  All home-made and all very good.  Oddly, I thought the best thing was the beans.  As you all know, I have a low opinion of any food that wasn't moving at one point, but these beans were really outstanding, and I've been to enough rib joints to have had my share of beans.  Maria made this coconut pastry that was really outstanding too.

The most interesting flavor of the night was this goat cheese and fig preserve combo (on the left) that was recommended at the local cheese shop.  Not a real fan of strong cheeses, but that flavor combo was really amazing.  Mrs.  Fly kept asking me to make her another cracker and by the end of the evening, the entire tray moved over to her side of the table.  I hope she took the 5 finger discount on the jar of preserves, like I told her to.

Also a photo of the ribs:
[x] ribs
[x] fall off bone
[x] home made BBQ sauce
[ ] leftovers

I'm actually thinking about changing my play schedule. Compared to about 6 months ago, the regular cash tables on Full Tilt seem to die a few hours earlier than before.  At least that is my perception - I wish I had some data to back it up.  Part of this is just mid to high stakes full ring dying out on FT, but I think part of it may be structural. By "structural," I mean one of more of: (i) Rush cannibalizing the player pool, (ii) mass multitablers moving over to Stars because the tables die out earlier (vicious cycle), (iii) less US players (especially from the West coast), etc. I'm hoping the latter is because of something like WSOP being around the corner (and people are trying to earn their seats) or people in school taking exams, rather than UIGEA making it difficult for people to deposit online.

I will from time to to look at the market trend for online poker.  Whenever you are involved in any business, you need to keep on top of what is going on in your industry.  I don't think the graph of FT's 6 month trend in number of cash game players captures Rush poker, which comprise a decent number of players.  But I could be wrong on this.  [EDIT: PokerScout confirmed that their data INCLUDES Rush data]  But since Rush was introduced in February, the right half of the graph is troubling.  And it somewhat backs up what I've been noticing about the tables dying out earlier over the past few months.  But it's hard to make any strong judgments on so little data, especially when seasonality could be involved.  I remember last fall there was a huge surge, so you need to take the data with a grain of salt.  But I would get alarmed if the average number of cash game players ever got below 10K tho.

FWIW, the 6 month trend for PokerStars (the largest site) increased marginally over the past 6 months, which is a good sign.  The trend over the last 6 months seems to be that Stars did better and everyone else did worse.  You need a certain critical mass to be viable as a poker site (so you have enough tables for multitablers, enough selection of games, bigger tournaments, etc).  Unfortunately for all other sites other than the top two, none of them have critical mass and barring an aggressive move, they will probably continue to slide. 

It seems like the peak number of tables online occurs around 2PM.  To be honest, I was shocked that the peak number of tables occurred in the early afternoon.  I thought it was in the late evening for sure.  I don't have the data from a year ago, but I could swear the drop-off in the evenings wasn't as large as it is now.  I'm wondering if there's been a drop-off in US participation.

[EDIT:  I just found out the times on that web site were in PST.  We ESTers always assume all times are in EST.  So 5PM EST seems like a more reasonable estimate for the peak traffic.]  So rather than playing from 8PM to 4+AM EST, as I had been before my recent playing binge, I think I can play from 11AM to 4PM, spend a few hours with the family and then maybe a few hours after 8PM.  This way I can be on a somewhat normal sleep pattern.  Still need to think about this some more tho.

I decided I've been playing too much and took part of the night off from playing.  I've played 85K hands so far this month and we're less than halfway into the month!  Instead I decided to some other poker-related things, like watching a few more videos, and thinking about some of my leaks.  Of course in the time I played, I got wanged for $1200 of negative ev.  Serves me right for being happy about being positive ev yesterday.  God damn it!  I'm such a fag.  I'm going to get better if it kills me!  Pleaz don't make me go back to work!

We also have a busy few days ahead of us.  I have a buddy coming to visit me tomorrow, so I probably won't play in the evening (maybe during the day). Mrs. Fly is going to some benefit thing in Manhattan tomorrow - something about families, domestic violence, fashion and violinists.  Hmm...  Hanging out with my out of town buddy with a few drinks watching the Yankee game, or getting dressed up in a tuxedo and schlepping into Manhattan for 6 hours of riveting travel and fun.  BTW, for those of you who don't know me, I consider wearing a suit or tuxedo akin to wearing a chicken suit.  Basically, I'm not comfortable in it, I feel ridiculous in it, and I would only do it if I had to for work.

Saturday we got invited to (again) to the Mario Batali disciple's house for another food orgy.  Even tho we met only a few months ago, we're starting to get pretty friendly, so I think I need to give them a name befitting this distinguished blog - for now, I will go with "Maria & Luigi" (even tho they are not Italian).  Let'sa go!  Sunday we're going into Manhattan to have dinner with some old friends.  So maybe getting back on a normal sleep schedule for the next few days isn't the worst thing for me (later post).

Yesterday, I got my luckboxing skills back. I had my luckiest session I could ever remember - I was +3.1K in EV. First, I won a nut straight > nut straight when I hit my flush on the river. Then I won a AT > AA preflop. And I also won a KK > AA preflop (sorry John K). Shockingly, I'm still down in ev for the month.

It's been my experience that I hover around plus or minus 25 buy-ins in ev over 2 million hands. Of course, this is not everyone's experience. I saw this unbelievable graph yesterday from a high stakes player. I would seriously consider quitting poker if I ran 250K under ev. Granted, he plays higher stakes, so this may only be like 100 buy-ins. But it's only over 38K hands! I can't imagine playing poker an getting hit for a buy-in of negative ev every 400 hands. Not only would I quit poker, but I may even start posting in the "online poker is rigged" threads. No - I would probably become the LEAD poster. So the next time you start thinking how unlucky you are, think about this graph.  Crazy shit can hapen in poker.

Yesterday was also the first day I seriously considering using a stop-loss. A stop-loss is when you stop playing because you lost a certain amount of money. I was up over 4K after a few hours and in about 30 minutes, I was only up 2K. I made a few questionable plays, like 3bet/shoving over a nit's 4bet with QQ (he had KK ldo). Then I called down someone in a 4way 3bet pot with 33 because he didn't bet the flop and only started betting when the third flush card hit the turn. He had AA - I really thought he had AK with a diamond. I rarely tilt, so I never felt the need to put in a stop loss. And the longer I play, the more money I should expect to make (assuming my judgment is unaffected). But I kept playing and my ev line eventually went to zero by the end of the session. Fortunately for me, I'm a luckbox and ended up 3K on the day. Luckbox + moron > common sense.
 
POKER
 
It appears that I was wrong about all the PFRs at a table adding to 100, because the PFR statistic INCLUDES 3bets.  So you can have more than 1 person credited for being a pre-flop raiser per hand.  Gee this makes me even nittier than ever.  Great!

I'm starting to feel like I've righted the ship.  I'm getting used to some of the new regs' playing styles and old regs' new playing styles and have started creating value by making bluffs and picking off their bluffs.  I'm going to assume the other day was an aberration because for most of my last session, my non-showdown line looked pretty good.  I actually made a decent amount of money yesterday even though I got set-over-setted twice (once in a 200BB pot) and KK < AA in a 200BB pot.  Oh, and below ev again, of course.

I'm on the verge of breaking out my 200K hand break-even stretch.  Sounds pretty sick to mention it.  I never thought I could ever go that long without winning.  I always thought 100K was closer to the most you could go for a decent player.  Hmm...  maybe it is, and I'm not a decent player.  Yeah, part of it was learning a new game (which I'm still learning), but I had been break even at the full ring games as well.  I'm not out of the woods, but it really is true what they say - you can go an absurdly long period time of run-bad - worse than you ever thought was possible.  To be fair tho, I did make a lot of spewy plays, had some problems adjusting to new regs and new playing styles, but I think most of that has been corrected.  Now I have to build on what I think my strengths are and to add start expanding my game.

POKER

I was looking thru my HEM and was shocked to see that I was playing 18/14 in 6max.  I mean that's pretty nitty.  But I don't think that it's all me.  As mentioned in a theory post a few months ago, the equilibrium PFR in 6max is going to be 16.6, because the sum of PFRs at a table can not be more than 100.  Even if you took six 25/20s and sat them down at a table, their pfr FOR THAT TABLE can not be more than 100. 

[EDIT:  I was wrong about all the PFRs at a table adding to 100, because the PFR statistic INCLUDES 3bets. So you can have more than 1 person credited for being a pre-flop raiser per hand, so the sum can be greater than 100.  But I did not change the post so you can marvel at my stupidity.]

When I select which tables to play, I generally look for loose tables.  It's a function of that old poker adage - when the tables are tight, play loose and when the tables are loose, play tight.  Since I naturally play tight, I prefer playing at looser tables.  So what ends up happening is that I'm sitting at a table with a bunch of LAGs (and hopefully a loose fish), and those guys open so much that I don't get a chance to be the pre-flop raiser as often.  I generally try to open like 15% UTG (which I think is closer to game theory optimal), but when I'm sitting with a bunch of guys who open 25+% UTG, when am I ever going to be the PFR?  This is what it must feel like to stand behind me at the buffet.  You see the food, but aren't sure if you're going to get any.  I'm pretty sure if I sat at a tight table, my PFR would be > 17.  My VPIP is low because I think I fold too much from the blinds (later post).  Stay tuned for more poker theory musing from a rakeback pro.

After 5 days of run good, I had my most frustrating session of the year. Over 7K hands, I literally had to fold every time I put money in the pot. Whenever I bluffed, some bad bluff card would come out to make me stop, or I get called by some guy that never folds, or I bluff into the handful of people on the planet who don't bet their top pair. Whenever I have a hand, the board would just run out horrifically bad or some nitty guy will just take some absurdly strong line. I don't ever remember losing like 75 cents a hand in non-showdown winnings before. What was especially shocking was how consistent it was - literally, my won at non showdown line was a steep line going down. Fortunately, some fool decided to shove over my cold 4bet with QQ at 5/10, so it wasn't all bad. But it was pretty bad.

I started reading the 6max forum at 2+2 and the topic of weight came up. Apparently, the typical online poker player is in his mid twenties, around 5'11" and weighs 150lbs. One of the more prominent players is 5'10" and 125lbs. This is not going to do much for the stereotype that online poker players are geeky. There were numerous people who were above average in height and weighed under 140. I don't understand how that's possible. But maybe I just see the world thru blubber coated glasses. Sure took some of the joy of eating my pizza for lunch today. Oh well. Now I'll have to get shredded to break the mold.

WHAT'S FOR DINNER?

On the topic of blubber, here's one of my favorite fast food meals.  I think KFC is one of the better preparations of chicken out there.  It's a little salty, but if they took some of the salt out, I think it's borderline gourmet - especially if you get a fresh batch.  The blend of herbs & spices are really flavorful and the meat is juicy.  If Colonel Sanders had decided to open a bistro in Manhattan instead of selling chicken franchises door to door, I think he would also have been successful.  And the absurd demand for chicken breast in the US means that I can get 14 pieces of legs and thighs for $10.  Now that's a bargain!

We only have it once every few months, but considering the whole family likes it, it saves Mrs. Fly cooking time, and it is dirt cheap, I'm not sure why we don't have it more.  Oh yeah...  I'm fat.

So during my off-day, I actually did some poker "work."  My computer seemed to be lagging a little bit.  I wasn't sure what the cause was.  In before the flood of "too much porn on your computer DFly" comments.

I thought it might be the fact that I have like 2 million hands in my HEM database - mostly because my Rush hud was updating a little slowly.  So I started a new database, named it "HEM10" so that I can remember I started it in 2010. This way, I'll know any data I need from before 2010 will be on my older database (which I can still access).  I only put the hands from my last 8 months on the new database.  I figure I should never need to go back any further than that.  People's games probably change every few months to a year, so I think data that's too old is going to be counter-productive.  Anyway, it actually takes about 12 hours of processing time to back up your old database, restore it to the new database, remove the hands you don't want, and to vacuum the new database to optimize it.  Hopefully this will do the trick for the next few months.

Otherwise, I may have to get a new computer.  We have 4 computers at home that we actively use:
  * My main poker desktop - which I only use for online poker
  * My secondary desktop - which I use for most personal uses, like itunes, finance, internet, etc.
  * My laptop - which I got from the FT store, which I use when I travel and which I keep on my night table.
  * Mrs Fly's laptop - which she uses for email, photos, recipes, etc.

It would really suck if I had to get a new machine, because I've only had my current poker machine for under a year.  I'm thinking a new desktop should last me 2-3 years.  This way, I can rotate my desktops so that I never have a machine older than 5-6 years (because by then it's pretty much useless).  It's an Intel Core2 Quad CPU, but I made the mistake of thinking that 3GB of memory would be adequate.  You definitely don't need that much if you only play a few tables, but playing 10+ tables at a time, and running several pieces of software (some of which use optical scraping technology - basically taking snapshots of the screen and decomposing it) requires a lot of processing power.  The last thing you want when you have a lot of money at the table and need to make a decision every few seconds is the aggravation of lags.

So I may need to get a new machine in a few months.  Adding to the buying pressure is that my second desktop is really struggling to run more than a few applications at a time.  I also spilled wine on my keyboard recently.  I attempted to flush it out with water before letting it air dry, but the keys are starting to feel a little sticky.  It was the wine!  I swear!

Anyway, a new CPU only costs like $500-$1000, and since this is how I make my money, it makes no sense for me to get aggravated by it.  But I'm going to give it a few months.