I'll be the first to admit I was pretty lucky to have met Mrs. Fly.  I pretty much knew after a week that she was going to be "the one."  Many times, it's going to take some time before you can tell if the person you are dating is going to be the right person for you for the rest of your life.  However, it usually only takes a few dates (if that) to figure out if the other person is Mrs. Wrong.  Here are my three sure-fire signals that I'm spending time with the wrong person:

3.  Does not share your life goals or lifestyle.  This may seem pretty self- explanatory, but I actually know a couple who divorced because they fought over whether or not they wanted a family.  Really?!?  You spent all your time talking about the moon you were going to lasso for your girl and you never talked about how you want to live the rest of your life?  Nice.  More closer to home, that's why I knew I could never marry someone who was a religious fanatic.  I spent the first 18 years of my life going to church every Sunday - I can do without now, thanks.  I don't mind going every once in a while, but a fanatic's gonna want to hang out to set up meals, do the whole Sunday school thing for the kids, and it probably means I have to hang out with other religious fanatics.  No thanks.  I'd rather marry a man...  um... probably not, but it's closer than you would think.  Another big requirement I have is that I couldn't marry a vegetarian.  Call me selfish, but I'm not going to have someone make me feel guilty about being on top of the food chain.  Even if they don't say a thing about how killing is wrong, good food is best enjoyed with others who enjoy good food.  I'm not spending 20% of my non-work, non-sleep time trying to enjoy a steak across from someone eating a sprout salad.  That sh*t is just depressing.

2.  Doesn't put out.  Yeah - I said it!  And I meant it!  We're all thinking it, so don't be acting all surprised and sh*t.  But I don't mean sex (necessarily) - I just mean show some consideration.  So I have (used to have, as far as Mrs. Fly knows) this dating rule where if by the third date, the woman doesn't offer to pay for one of the meals, or offer to get dessert or bake me some cookies or whatever, I need to let them go.  I suppose you can make an exception if the woman is like dirt poor or just got out of a time machine from the 1800s.  But c'mon!  What kind of reasonable, thoughtful person isn't going to offer to do something for someone who's taken them out a few times?  Sort of on the same thought pattern, I once broke up with a girl for being 20-30 minutes late on our first two dates.  Sorry the Milton Bradley game convention is held annually 3000 miles west, in Las Vegas.

I don't think you would ever guess what #1 is.  I suppose there can be exceptions to the two things above, but there can be no exception to this one...

1.  Treats people in the service professions like crap (i.e. waiters, dry cleaners, delivery guys, etc).  Why, you may ask?  To me it just shows your level of common human courtesy and decency - I don't think this needs any further explanation unless you are a violator of the rule.  A further consideration is that if you ever go thru a "for poorer" stage of your relationship (economically or emotionally), that person may treat *you* the same way.  "You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille...  with four hungry children and a crop in the field..."  A little Kenny Rogers goes a long way.

I'm feeling a little spunky today.  Anyway, these are just some views that *I* have, that may not be universally shared.  It seems to have worked okay for me.  But then again, I am a luckbox.  So maybe I'm playing my 64o like it's pocket aces.  :-)